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Inssssuferable little beasssssts By Janet the Snake (PTR) -- Oh, ssssso Pessssky the Rat issss allowed to ssspew hate on thissss blog. Disssgusssting little sssnack. Well two can play at thissssssss game. Hissshisshisshisshiss. Let'ssss sssee what our rodent friendsssss have been up to the lassst few dayssss, shall we? 
A rat has been blamed for plunging a football stadium into darkness during a World Cup qualifier match. Lights suddenly went out at the 110,000-seater Salt Lake Stadium in Calcutta during a match between India and Japan. - Pakistan Daily Times
Oh yessss, and that issss jussst the beginning. In Alasssska, they are betting on Gerbilsss. The gerbilsss have sssome sssort of racket going and they are sssstealing all the humansss money. Thisss isss unaccssseptable. Reptilessss are ssssupposssed to be in charge of that sssort of thing.
The "rat races" involve neither rats nor racing. It involves a gerbil and a roulette wheel with about 50 spokes, each painted one of seven colors. Each spoke has a hole for the gerbil to dive into, and people bet on what color the gerbil chooses. Anchorage Daily News
Thesssse racketsss are going on all over the placssse. And in Kanssssasss the little beassstletsss don't even bother to exsssspend any effort:
In the average race, one or two gerbils would bolt out of the starting gate, then stop halfway to the finish line.
“It's funny how some just run out and stop,” said Sieben, whose Mrs. Gotrocks was a few inches short of the finish line when she stopped for a rest.
“They need to stay focused,” said friend and fellow gerbil owner Nancy Graves. --Kansas City Star
Lazsssy little ssssnackssss. I wasss there, you know, right at the finissssh line, waiting for them with an excsssellent hot dog bun, and they jussssst wouldn't come any further. Ssssniveling thingssss.
8:18:31 AM
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Who
is The Rat? 
Dr.
Sneakypants
Lumpy
the Mongoose
Larry
the Spotted Owl