Pesky the Rat: News and comment from a rodent's perspective on the pressing issues of the day.

Last updated: 10/9/2004; 10:44:23 PM
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Duuuuuuuuuuude.Who is The Rat?
Pesky the Rat is renowned in rodentian circles for his toothy political commentary. Born in a garbage pile near San Jose, California, Pesky is a former Congressrat and briefly served as President of the United States during the 2000 election crisis.

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Janet the Snake is a regular columnist here at Pesky the Rat, much to Pesky's chagrin. Her hobbies include eating Democrats and squeezing parking meters until the quarters pop out. Go to Janet's home page  , Read Janet's biography,

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Pesky's Top Stories
bullet_blue (0k image) Bush-Kerry Debate Transcript: Bush runs Windows
bullet_blue (0k image) Interview with Hurricane Ivan
bullet_blue (0k image) Beast-On-the-Street interviews: election 2004
bullet_blue (0k image) Ed the Terrorist-Detecting Pig: Part 2
bullet_blue (0k image) Ed the Terrorist-Detecting Pig
bullet_blue (0k image) Bush-Cheney campaign recruits scientists to create unfuckable campaign strategy
bullet_blue (0k image) Paddleboat Veterans for Truth Slam Kerry
bullet_blue (0k image) Fahrenheit 7-11
bullet_blue (0k image) Interview with Bob the Barnacle, Nader Supporter
bullet_blue (0k image) Bill the Oppressed Komodo Dragon
bullet_blue (0k image) Tippy the Libertarian Cow interviews Howard Dean
bullet_blue (0k image) Interview with Bessie the Mad Cow
bullet_blue (0k image) Interview with Debbie the Touchscreen Voting Machine.
bullet_blue (0k image) Bush signs bill to ban feminine products men do not understand
bullet_blue (0k image) Bush appointed by God--actual transcript!Chicks for Dixie Chicks! Yeeeeeeeeehaw!
bullet_blue (0k image) Donald Rumsfeld spontaneously transforms into Bar of Soap
bullet_blue (0k image) The Creation Myth of an Isolated South American Tribe Whose Only Contact with the Outside World Consists of a Single Episode of "The O’Reilly Factor".
bullet_blue (0k image) Alabama Ten Commandments pack a punch
bullet_blue (0k image) God converts to Microsoft Windows
bullet_blue (0k image) Scientists discover subatomic Republicans resonating to ultrasonic talk radio
bullet_blue (0k image) FBI apprehends The Unmarked Van
bullet_blue (0k image) A WMD ponders its own existence
bullet_blue (0k image) Disraught bacteria commits apoptosis after failing to infect George W. Bush with common sense

Recent Posts

Dedicated blograts view Pesky the Rat 100,000 times
 10/9/04
Insane Turkeys: Debate Edition
 10/8/04
Interview with Duplicitious Dick
 10/7/04
Duplicitious Dick Doing a Dance
 10/6/04
A very special Op-Ed by Mt. St. Helens.
 10/5/04
Rat vs Snake
 10/4/04
A challenge
 10/3/04
Presidential Debate: Actual Transcript
 10/1/04
Human softball follies
 9/30/04
Mindless Filler: Rhino Butt
 9/29/04
Beast-on-the-Street: who are you voting for?
 9/27/04
Poetry Moment with Ted the Little Green Snotball
 9/24/04
Ballgame hangover and sheep
 9/23/04
Today’s Pig – Detected Terror Alert Level: Extra-Sloppy Red
 9/22/04
A weapon of mass destruction typing a dubious memo
 9/21/04
White House hires Iraqi Information Minister as new spokesman
 9/20/04
Bush found to be work of fiction
 9/15/04
Inssssuferable little beasssssts
 9/14/04
If she had only asked me
 9/13/04
Interview with Hurricane Ivan
 9/13/04
Cheney threatens to attack America if Kerry wins
 9/8/04

Click here for Pesky's General Store!

sneakypants_teaser (6k image)Dr. Sneakypants
Dr. Sneakypants, mad rodent scientist-in-residence at Stanford University's Hoover Institute, cranks out timely inventions on a regular basis.

bullet_blue (0k image) The Ever-Expanding Electoral Enactor
bullet_blue (0k image) Dr. Sneakypants' Fabulous Phleminator
bullet_blue (0k image) Dr. Sneakypants' Fabulous Homeopathic Foreign Policy Generator
bullet_blue (0k image) Dr. Sneakypants' Fabulous Fibulizer
bullet_blue (0k image) Dr. Sneakypants' Fabulous Filth Filter
bullet_blue (0k image) Dr. Sneakypants' fabulous furbalizer
bullet_blue (0k image) Dr. Sneakypants' fabulous fusion devices

Foreign Affairs
bullet_blue (0k image) A weapon of mass destruction doing a jig
bullet_blue (0k image) President Bush sends grain of rice to testify before 9/11 panel
bullet_blue (0k image) Defense Department offers Carly Simon 50k for location of WMDs, Saddam Hussein, Colin Powell.
bullet_blue (0k image) Rumsfeld, Savage, Berlusconi attend sensitivity training
bullet_blue (0k image) Secret Saddam tape revealed!
bullet_blue (0k image) Where the living heck are those WMDs? Special Report
bullet_blue (0k image) Bush Art Advisors quit; never could find guy named Art
bullet_blue (0k image) Bush's attempt to show Iraq's "smoking gun" during State of the Union address goes horribly wrong

Economy
bullet_blue (0k image) Professor Screeeeeeecherooni talks about feline economics and the job market
bullet_blue (0k image) Pesky the Rat's official guide to the new Medicare drug benefit

bullet_blue (0k image) Wilbur Screecheroooooooni talks about feline economics
bullet_blue (0k image) Bush names Nicolas II Manufacturing Czar
bullet_blue (0k image) Market Fundamentalists hire new God; said to be more cost effective
bullet_blue (0k image) Susan the Human searches for a home, gets pointed to death
bullet_blue (0k image) Bush flies in fighter jet to Vegas, loses his shirt to William Bennet
bullet_blue (0k image) Bush says tax cuts to create millions of jobs in funeral industry
bullet_blue (0k image) Bush: "Those of you with class have no right to make fun of those of us who have none"

lumpy_small2 (7k image)Lumpy the Mongoose
Lumpy is Pesky's Extremely Reliable Anonymous Source, traveling the world at breakneck speeds to bring you all the news that nobody else would consider fit to print. Lumpy has been known to simultaneously give live reports from three continents at the same time.

bullet_blue (0k image) Lumpy's biography
bullet_blue (0k image) Lumpy's Quantum Newsflash: Bush attempts to plant porn on Howard Dean's computer
bullet_blue (0k image) Lumpy's unfortunate chicken-related illnes

PoliticsOoooh! I like that. Do it some more.
bullet_blue (0k image) Condoleeza Rice says ancient trees may chop themselves in an effort to influence the presidential election.
bullet_blue (0k image) President Bush original State-of-Union - REVEALED!
bullet_blue (0k image) Bush presses red button, lights go out in East
bullet_blue (0k image) Californians to recall themselves
bullet_blue (0k image) Stop the Campaign Kitty! Stop it now!
bullet_blue (0k image) Scientists warn of massive California Recall Kitty
bullet_blue (0k image) Arnold Schwarzenegger shocker: actor is really twelve bunnies in a human suit.
bullet_blue (0k image) Tom DeLay visited by supernatural Taco Bell chihuahua
bullet_blue (0k image) Interview with Jiggles the Poodle, Senator Santorum's Ex
bullet_blue (0k image) Tippy the Libertarian Cow interviews Tim Robbins
bullet_blue (0k image) Interview with Michael Savage the Howler Monkey
bullet_blue (0k image) John Ashcroft persecutes Sea Hares for sexual practices
bullet_blue (0k image) Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist chased by headless laboratory cats, nearly crushed by falling cow
bullet_blue (0k image) Interview with Tippy the Libertarian Cow
bullet_blue (0k image) Behind the Bush poll numbers

Hamster's Choice
bullet_blue (0k image) Musk Ox balancing Weapon of Mass Destruction
bullet_blue (0k image) MC Hammer-Ariel Sharon-Hattie the Herpes Virus-J-Lo-Ben Affleck combo story  
bullet_blue (0k image) English muffin manufacturer in massive conspiracy to frame Michael Jackson.
bullet_blue (0k image) Squirrels take over San Francisco
bullet_blue (0k image) Pesky the Rat celebrates one year of blog
bullet_blue (0k image) Who is Lumpy the Mongoose?
bullet_blue (0k image) Pesky the Rat celebrates one year of blog
bullet_blue (0k image) Eye of Sauron caught shoplifting at Wal-Mart
bullet_blue (0k image) Interview with Funny Cide, near-champion racehorse
bullet_blue (0k image) Hair dryer hamsters on strike to protest treatment by Diva
bullet_blue (0k image) Rodent physics
bullet_blue (0k image) Duplication & Multiplication of Chickens Act (DMCA)
bullet_blue (0k image)Disturbing interview with Keiko the Killer Whale
bullet_blue (0k image) Full archives
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larry_owl (5k image) Larry the Spotted Owl
Larry the Spotted Owl is from Kings Canyon National Park in Northern California. He drives a Harley and has multiple tatoos. He also plays pool and smokes too much. Larry watches really lousy movies so you don't have to, and occasionally makes political commentary.


bullet_blue (0k image) Larry's reviews Gothika
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bullet_blue (0k image) The Rat avoids Gigli
bullet_blue (0k image) Larry the Spotted Owl Intro

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Thursday, September 30, 2004
Human softball follies

By Pesky the Rat (PTR) - Susan the Human was off at softball again last night, playing for the company in a league known for voluntary errors, and lost in spectacular fashion. 21-7. At one point it became obvious that all the gloves in the world could not catch a ball when attached to one of the players on her team. If balls could talk, and we thank God almighty they cannot, this one would have busted its stitches laughing. 

It's been a busy week, but regular news coverage returns tomorrow, after Susan nurses her wounds and wonders why her company, with some of the finest research minds in the industry, cannot seem to win a softball game against a bar or a painting crew.

Note: emails sent to the author will not receive a response unless they are specific. We've been getting some spam via the Radio Userland email link on the left. If you send a very general email (eg, "do I know you?", we assume you are fishing for an email address.

8:40:28 AM   


 

 

 

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